My Top 10 Beer Lists

If writing for and reading blogTO has taught me anything, it’s this: People fucking love lists.

Accordingly, in what might be the smartest, laziest, SEO-ist thing I’ve ever done, I thought I’d post the ultimate click-bait this Friday afternoon in a blatant attempt at attracting some traffic to the blog while doing as little work as possible: A top ten list of  lists.

Brilliant, right?

Below is a linked list of my favourite lists that I’ve written. And while this is an exercise in supremely lazy writing, it turns out that this is actually pretty damn informative, and not a bad way to get you in the mood to drink a few beers this weekend, if I don’t say so myself.

Now I’ll just share a link to this post on twitter with some trending hashtags and badaboom bada bing, I win the internet today. #bonerpatrol Presumably if this goes well, I might one day conceive of a top ten list of lists of lists, but I assume the universe would implode if I did that so let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Enjoy! Continue reading “My Top 10 Beer Lists”

Harry Porter and the Bourbon Soaked Vanilla Bean is coming to the LCBO

BBB Harry porter

Great news for fans of American porters, bourbon, vanilla, and JK Rowling-related puns: Great Lakes Brewery’s excellent “Harry Porter & the Bourbon Soaked Vanilla Bean” will soon be available at the LCBO.

Sources at Great Lakes have confirmed to the staff at Ben’s Beer Blog (yes, that’s just me chatting with Troy) that the rich, creamy, bourbon-y, vanilla-y porter that has developed a devoted following as an occasional GLB one-off will be the latest beer to join Great Lakes’ popular Tank Ten series and will appear on LCBO shelves in early February.

In order to properly launch the beer, Great Lakes will be throwing a party on February 6th at The Loose Moose (event poster below) which will feature an appropriately rich and delicious lineup of dark GLB beers. In addition to Harry Porter & the Bourbon Soaked Vanilla Bean on tap, in cans, and on cask, there will also be Harry Porter & the Fairgrounds Coffee Bean, a Bourbon Barrel-Aged Porter with Vanilla Bean, and one more as-yet-unnamed surprise beer made with cherries. Continue reading “Harry Porter and the Bourbon Soaked Vanilla Bean is coming to the LCBO”

Why you should send me free beer

Free Schlitz

In case there was any doubt, allow me to make something clear: I routinely receive free beer.

As you might also imagine, most beer writers do. In fact virtually all beer writers with any sort of respectable following have probably received at least a few free beers and I imagine a handful of them got into the beer writing biz  for the express purpose of receiving free beer.

Shocking stuff, I know.

That earth-shattering revelation aside, you might not realize that there are actually some mixed feelings about how we should talk about the fact that virtually all of us receive freebies. On the one hand, there are some beer writers who thoroughly enjoy flaunting their freebies. The job of a beer writer isn’t exactly one that typically makes a ton of dough so the beer perks might be considered something like the job’s “benefits.” For some, I imagine, bragging on social media about being among the first to try the next experimental offering or new one-off from a brewery are simply extensions of those perks. Continue reading “Why you should send me free beer”

I want to be the Beer Mayor of Toronto

Beer Mayor

I am running for Mayor.*

It’s something I’ve been thinking about for a while but about which I’ve always been hesitant given a few obvious obstacles, not the least of which is my fondness for beer.

This past year or so though, the current mayor of Toronto has shown me that people with drinking habits far more serious than mine are capable of winning an election.

Indeed, he’s even shown that one can hold onto their seat in public office–and even register to run for re-election of that office–despite being photographed with now-dead criminals, admitting to smoking crack cocaine while serving as the mayor, drinking and driving, and making reference to “eating pussy” on live TV.

So I figure, what the hell. If this guy can do it, I can totally be mayor.

So I’m running for Mayor.* Continue reading “I want to be the Beer Mayor of Toronto”