Category: Beer

Contest: Win an Amsterdam Cruiser bike

Posted on by Ben

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There are two things I like about summer: drinking sessionable, hoppy beers and riding my bike.

That’s why when Amsterdam Brewery recently announced that they were giving away the above-pictured totally bitchin’ cruiser bike branded with the logo of their equally bitchin’ 4.9% golden pale ale, Cruiser Ale Day Pale Ale, I was perhaps less-than-subtle in showering praise on said bike on Amsterdam’s social media.

The “like-love” didn’t necessarily net me the result I wanted (I was really hoping they’d just be so into my enthusiasm that they’d send me a bike) but it did snag me a great opportunity for you, my loyal readers.

Yes, the ‘Dam Good Beer People are letting me give away a bike to a reader of Ben’s Beer’s Blog.

To enter, simply tweet a message telling me where you’d take your first ride on your new Cruiser cruiser if you won. Remember to include the hashtag #winacruiser as well as the hashtag #bbb so I know you heard about the contest here.

I know, two hashtags, what is this, soviet Russia?

For those of you who don’t have twitter, first of all, welcome to 2015, and second of all, you can enter via comment, below, as well.

As with all contests I’ve run previously, I’ll put all entrants into a hat and pull one winner at random; but I’ll also enter any entrants that make me laugh into the hat twice to double your chances of winning–so be funny!

As a condition of the rules of this contest, the winner may be required to double me on their new bike while I drink a six pack of Cruise All Day Pale Ale.

Contest closes July 20, 2015.

On selling out

Posted on by Ben

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You’ll never understand it
Try to buy and brand it
I win, you lose, cause it’s my job
To keep craft beer elite.
This beverage ain’t your fuckin’ industry.

~Fat Mike, if he were a beer blogger, probably. 

As it is with music, there is an important distinction in beer between what we might define as that which is indie and that which we might deem corporate.

Craft beer, you might say, is  something generally akin to your favourite band that’s still playing local clubs, manning their own merch tables, and banging out records on a small record label–or even no label at all. Much like craft breweries, indie bands maintain a devoted local following because they make a quality product and there is a perception that they do what they do because they love it and they’re not just in it for the money, man.

By the same token, we might readily compare big breweries to something along the lines of a boy band or the Spice Girls: a sort of fabricated version of the concept of a “band,” assembled by people with an understanding of the market and a unique ability to create a product that will have mass appeal. It’s often a profoundly successful “product,” but to those who are passionate about the scene, it’s a watered down, passionless version of what should be a good thing.

This is a simplified analogy for sure, but to me there are actually a lot of parallels between craft beer and independent music, the most notable of which is that rather icky feeling we all get when a treasured brewery or band suddenly becomes financially successful. Continue reading “On selling out” →

Beer and Loathing: Pliny, dubstep, and hostile Mexicans

Posted on by Ben

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Me: This is kind of a rough neighbourhood, man. I’m pretty sure that’s a gang over there.
Jeff: That one guy has a tuba!
Me: Oh, well then we should probably go wherever they’re going.

In retrospect, following the gang of Mexicans simply because they had musical instruments was clearly a mistake.

Our first tip should have been the bouncer at the bar that they led us to who, when patting down me and my 6’7″ drinking companion, Jeff, seemed far too surprised when told we didn’t have any weapons on us. “Not even a knife?” he had said.

Inside we were quickly abandoned by the band who would shortly undertake one of the most terrible live performances I’ve ever seen and we were greeted by a sea of brown faces looking up at Jeff. Continue reading “Beer and Loathing: Pliny, dubstep, and hostile Mexicans” →

Beer and Loathing in Portland

Posted on by Ben

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As I write this, I am 30,000 feet in the air, screaming toward America’s west coast for what will surely be a week of the sort of debauchery you regret for about a week following, but reminisce fondly about for years thereafter.

I’m heading to the annual Craft Brewers Conference, this year being held in Portland, Oregon; a place with more craft breweries per capita than any other place in the world.

So yes, there will be beer.

Of course, the trip won’t be without its problems, the most notable of which being that somehow in the weeks prior to the journey, I have slipped inexplicably deep into overdraft in my bank account. While it was likely a compendium of too many shawarma lunches, afternoon coffees, and liquor store runs that had sent me irreparably on the course to minor debt, it was surely the gear I assembled prior to my journey that really did me in. Continue reading “Beer and Loathing in Portland” →

80 alternatives to Guinness to drink this St. Patrick’s Day

Posted on by Ben

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Guinness is a pretty great beer.

It’s got a long storied history dating back to roughly 1770, is arguably one of the most famous beer brands in the entire world, and will forever be the stout against which all other stouts are measured.

It also tastes good. I enjoy an occasional Guinness and you’ll likely find that, if you’re with a fan of good beer but trapped in some shitty bar where the tap lines are all purchased by breweries, that beer fan will likely just order a Guinness because, among the other ubiquitous big names, it’s generally the one consistently reliable and decent beer that’s available virtually everywhere and, provided the beer is fresh and the lines are clean, is an interesting, comforting, rich, and creamy stout.

But come every god damn March, I come to hate Guinness. I detest the idea that we’re supposed to drink more of the black stuff–which already sells in excess of 850 million litres a year–in order to commemorate the death of Ireland’s patron saint. There is so much Guinness marketing crammed down our throats in the lead-up to March 17th every year that it’s enough to make you rage vomit bile so thick and creamy as to rival the famous dry stout itself.

So this St. Patrick’s day, I say fuck Guinness.

The notion that we have to drink a certain thing on a certain day just because a huge marketing campaign tells us we have to is bullshit, man *flips collar on leather jacket, lights cigarette*

If you must go out and drink or otherwise celebrate the arrival of Christianity in Ireland or mark the occasion of the lifting of Lenten restrictions you almost certainly don’t actually follow, why not drink something else? Continue reading “80 alternatives to Guinness to drink this St. Patrick’s Day” →

What the hell is Crazy Beard?

Posted on by Ben

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You may have seen the above-pictured monstrosity on the shelves along with the cider in your local LCBO lately.

It’s “Wild Apple Ale” from Crazy Beard and even though the product is called Crazy Beard “Wild Apple Ale” it lives in the cider section since it isn’t actually a beer. I’m not even sure it would meet strict definitions of cider, but presumably the company is so “Wild to the Core!” they just don’t care about conventional things like “accurately labeling a beverage.”

I have seen the atrocious can on shelves before and while it offended me in a way that only a snotty beer and beverage purist can be offended, I put it off as simply something that doesn’t interest me. Life is too short to rage at all the overly-sweet alcoholic beverages that don’t meet with my approval. However, as it turns out, in addition to the label being questionable from a design standpoint, it seems the can wrap isn’t really the highest quality material either. I was alerted to this fact by an intrepid reader who sent me the picture below this afternoon.

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Yes, it appears that Crazy Beard Wild Apple Ale’s label is hiding something of a surprise under all that wacky design. As my anonymous tipster speculated, this “Apple Ale” might actually just be William Premium Canadian Cider–or at the very least, is sold in William Cider cans. Continue reading “What the hell is Crazy Beard?” →

Are the Blue Jays breaking the law by not offering better beer selection?

Posted on by Ben

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The Toronto Blue Jays are the only team in Major League baseball that doesn’t offer local beer at their baseball games.

Obviously, this sucks.

People who like baseball often also like beer. People who like to go support their local baseball team might conceivably also like to support their local breweries.

The Toronto Blue Jays organization apparently doesn’t give a shit about these people. Instead, they are happy to award exclusivity to the foreign-owned entity that was willing to cough up the biggest chunk of dough for the right to be the only beer sold at the Rogers Centre (if you’re still not sure who exactly I’m talking about, look no further than that glaring Budweiser logo that adorns most of the Toronto Blue Jays’ left field).

There was of course a glimmer of hope recently in March of 2013 when I broke the news that Steamwhistle–the folks making baseball-ready pilsner literally across the street from the Jays–would finally be allowed to sell their beer at the Rogers Centre.

Of course, being able to drink Toronto beer at a Toronto baseball game was short lived and almost exactly one year later, conceivably because the folks at AB InBev had had enough “competition,” I was breaking the news that the Good Beer Folks had been unceremoniously given the boot.

There’s been some rumbling in the interim–notably a petition created by Phil Cacace, the owner of the great Toronto bar, Tall Boys, some scant media coverage, and at least one perennially-irascible Toronto beer writer who has made a point of raising the issue on twitter every once and a while but, for the most part, we’re all pretty much resigned to accepting watery lager to drink while we take in live games of Toronto’s generally watered-down version of professional baseball. Continue reading “Are the Blue Jays breaking the law by not offering better beer selection?” →

Nickel Brook’s Naughty Neighbour is now available in cans

Posted on by Ben

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In case the title of this post and the image above didn’t make it abundantly clear: Nickel Brook’s Naughty Neighbour is now available in cans.

You can find the 473mL cans now at the LCBO for $2.80.

Personally, I’m excited about this for a few reasons.

First and foremost, I’m a big fan of the current trend toward sessionable pale ales. There has been an argument made as of late that “sessionable” is basically just a nice way to say the beer facilitates binge drinking. Frankly, I’m OK with that. Yes, I am a nerdy beer-sniffing snob and am capable of approaching beer with a discerning, critical eye, nose, and mouth, but there are also times I feel like drinking three, four, five, even six of the same beers in one sitting. And Naughty Neighbour is actually chief among my beer choices when I opt to do so. The 4.9% American Pale Ale is aromatic, with all the grapefruity, citrusy, bitter goodness I love in a pale ale but at wholly reasonable 4.9% (and I know it seems like I’ve been giving a lot of love to Nickel Brook lately, but let’s face it, they’re making some good beer). Continue reading “Nickel Brook’s Naughty Neighbour is now available in cans” →

No, I won’t share your infographic on my blog

Posted on by Ben

The following is an email response I sent to “Liyonala” this morning while I was sitting on the toilet. She was following up to a previous inquiry about my interest in posting some content she was “excited” to see on my blog. 

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Liyonala,

 

The infographic you are asking me to share on my blog is about marketing, and my blog is about beer. I didn’t respond to your first email that suggested “readers of my blog enjoy posts on similar topics” because the claim is patently false and anyone who had taken even a cursory glance at my writing would be able to glean that. I assumed that you were either just spamming me or were a person who had suffered major head trauma. Either way, I decided no response at all was the best approach.

​Now that you have sent this second email, I feel compelled to respond.

I understand that it has become popular for advertising and marketing companies to enlist people to create “infographics” in an attempt to draw web traffic. They are short, pithy, and image-based ways to get people to click links and, to anyone who wasted their life getting a degree in marketing, they might seem like a perfect approach to ensnaring “millenials,” a largely-fictional demographic invented by these same marketing people who ridiculously presume that humans born around the same year must share inherent purchasing and consumption habits. I get that. I’ve accepted it. Infographics are a “thing” now and, as a result, and I get a handful of requests like yours every week. Continue reading “No, I won’t share your infographic on my blog” →

Stone Brewing Co. is coming to Ontario

Posted on by Ben

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Something that has been a poorly-kept secret among gossipy Ontario hop fiends for a while can now finally be officially confirmed:  Escondido, California’s Stone Brewing Co. is coming to Ontario.

I spoke with Rob Hern, the Retail Sales and Marketing Manager for Horizon Beers, the agency that represents Stone in Canada and he confirmed that, yes, I can finally actually publicly state that Stone’s award-winning, West-coast-style, hop-forward beers will be here in February.

Stone IPA, one of the best-selling and well-respected IPAs in America will be joined on draught in the province by Arrogant Bastard, a beer that you probably don’t have a refined enough palate to appreciate. Hern says there will be a handful of launch events in the province the week of February 23rd (with obviously a majority here in Toronto, the centre of the universe) and, while he’s keeping the exact details under wraps for now, he suggested that visits from brewery officials and even a collaboration brew with an Ontario brewery might be in the works to publicize the beers’ arrival. Let the sexual favour offers from local brewmasters to Rob Hern begin.

The news of Stone’s arrival comes fairly recently on the heels of the news that both California’s Sierra Nevada and Scotland’s Brew Dog will be infiltrating Ontario’s beer market so this adds even further speculation to the oft-debated question of how Ontario beer will fare in competition with more established craft brands. For their part, Stone brings the credibility of not only being the the 10th largest craft brewery in the United States, but also one that was actually rated “the #1 All Time Top Brewery on Planet Earth” by the readers of Beer Advocate. No, seriously.  Continue reading “Stone Brewing Co. is coming to Ontario” →